Nothing to look forward to . . . yet smiling

They say when it rains, it pours, well in my life there’s not just continuous rain, there’s already a flood turning into a calamity. I stopped working last year, and honestly I love every minute of my life being a mom. I cook, clean, wash the dishes, fold the laundry, take my daughter to school, tutor her. It’s the perfect life for me. Sad to say thou that my other half couldn’t say the same. He’s had a hell of a year working, he hates it, and by next month he will be jobless. Yes, my husband is being let go, he’s in sales you see, & he didn’t make quota. With all our efforts put together, still he didn’t make it and now with just 37 days to go before Christmas he will be jobless.

A lot of dilemma comes crashing to my mind, how will we eat, how bout my daughter’s tuition, what will we do !!! Would you believe that despite the crisis at hand I can smile. Yes, I think that I have finally, truly lost my marbles. With the pending predicament of going hungry & penniless this coming Christmas, their is yet happiness in my heart. Don’t look at me, I can’t explain why.

Is it cheating even when it's not physical?

Infidelity is always assumed to be sexual.

The moment you utter the words ‘cheating’ or ‘infidelity’ people assume that the culprit has been involved in sexual transgressions with a third person. However, infidelity can also be emotional. In fact more often than not, it is emotional. Here, we break this down for you and explain this unfamiliar, yet highly prevalent, occurrence.

1. What is emotional infidelity?

Consider this: you are in a relationship. You love your partner and enjoy a healthy sex life. Yet, there is this one friend who you love to talk to everyday; she is that one person who you turn to in times of crisis or joy; she is the first person to come to your mind and you are always looking for ways to talk to her. If you find yourself in a similar situation, then you are committing emotional infidelity. Emotional infidelity is when we get emotionally close to a person who is not our partner.

2. The signs

When one is cheating or being cheated on, there are certain give-away signs that one can look out for. For one, your partner will stop sharing their feelings with you and will no longer confide in you. When you probe your partner, you will realise that there is nothing wrong with her, but still something integral has gone missing from your relationship. Less talking, not sharing of feelings, less conversations are all signs of emotional infidelity.

3. Why it’s more dangerous than sexual infidelity

A sexual transgression is a physical need and doing. When caught, it is relatively easier to no longer be physically involved with the person. However, the same does not hold true in case of emotional infidelity. When you are involved with someone emotionally, it is very difficult to tear away from the person. This inability to emotionally call it off results in divorces / break-ups because there can never be room for a third person in the relationship.

When in a relationship, it only makes sense to give it your 100%. However, if you do find yourself in a similar situation then you need to take things in hand before all hell breaks loose.

1 2 3 . . . of a great kiss

All men want to be master kissers; only a few actually manage to be one. 

No man will accept the fact that he isn’t a good enough kisser and needs to work on his ability to kiss. But secretly, all men at one point in their lives have browsed articles that tell them more about how to kiss amazingly well. We believe that even the best one’s can do better, which is why we present to you, tips that will help you learn the art of kissing.

1. Hold, Don’t Grab

When your girlfriend is standing/sitting very close to you, just close enough to allow you to kiss her, hold her gently. Most men make the common error of latching on to their girlfriends. Such a movement makes most women feel unsafe and uncomfortable. So, hold her tender and allow the mood to set in.

2. Lips & lick

Hold her face in your hand and kiss her lips first. Then tongue them. Please don’t shove your tongue down her throat right away. It will be the most unpleasant thing to do. Allow your tongue to feel the smoothness of her lips and allow her to feel yours. It is very important that you work your lips. Don't just leave your mouth open as if you were breathing in air. Move it and give your jaw muscles some much needed exercise. Play it slow and let the tempo build.

3. Tongue-play

Do it like the French! Play with your tongues: tongue kiss, kiss her tongue and even suck on it. Use the tongue as your foremost weapon and play with it. Along with this, engage in kissing and biting (gentle), and you are bound to get her excited and aroused. However, the most important thing here is not to smear her face & lips with saliva. Eeeeks! Let that happen, and you can be sure this would be your last kiss with her.

4. Full throttle

Once you have spent enough time kissing and tonguing and gone through with the above subtle steps, you can now completely tongue her. But again, don’t be hasty. Do it gradually and with the flow.

Armed with the knowledge of the ultimate art of kissing, you can kiss your intimacy nightmares good bye: at least till you don't jump into the next step without proper guidance from us.

read some more at Yahoo! SHE

Alone . . . but having FUN !

Who said fun is something you can only have when you are with friends? Beer buddies, tennis court mates and childhood pals you hang out with are NOT needed for you to indulge in some feel-good factor! Read on to know how.

1. Watch Movies

If you are a movie buff, you certainly don’t need any company to have a good time. You can either rent a few DVDs, or stack up on downloaded prints, to prepare for your movie marathon. And hey! You may just not realize how the afternoon, or maybe even the entire weekend flew past!

2. Read Books

If you are an avid reader, you certainly can have a lot of fun alone. Pick your favourite authors from the local library; make sure you have enough bags of chips to munch, and of course, a comfortable couch in the house to park yourself on.

3. Gardening

Possessing a small garden can be a lot of fun. You can procure a few tools, get some pots and plants from a local nursery and get digging! Not only will you land up having fun by yourself, you are also bound to feel enervated and pleased with yourself. In the process, you may also become the proud owner of a pretty little lawn.

4. Travel

A weekend getaway to a quiet hill station, or even a long holiday spent in solitude can do wonders to the soul. Take along your favourite books and music. If you like to capture your memories, carry your camera, notebook or laptop along. Indulge in the sights, sounds and other pleasures of the new locale and feel your mind and body getting refreshed.

5. Learn a New Instrument

There can be nothing more uplifting to the morale than accomplishing something all by yourself. Why not take online classes and learn to play a music instrument that catches your fancy?

6. Online Activities

Speaking of doing things online, there is a plethora of activities that can keep you occupied and engaged. Whilst online games are certainly No. 1 when it comes to keeping users hooked, other activities also exist. Social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter, Google+ and many others are a pastime for many. Online chatting is also interesting and exciting. Simply reading about topics that interest you can also be a lot of fun!

Being alone is not a bane. In fact, if you know how to make the most of your time alone, you can really have a lot of fun. So, enjoy yourself!

Secrets

Money matters

Okay, we didn’t miss the memo and yes we do know that it’s the 21^st century, but according to studies women do like men who have money. One study found that 64 per cent of women would still prefer their men to earn more than them. A study from the British Journal of Psychology confirms that women are attracted to men who drive expensive cars.

If you’re thinking that your girl doesn’t want a man with money and that she’s happy earning all the cash whilst you sit on the couch catching up with trash TV, think again; she’ll never tell you that she wants you to be rich because it’s bad taste, so you’ll never know the truth.  

Flirting

Flirting is something we all do, but your girlfriend seems to flirt with everyone and anything. So, what should you do? Confront her and kick up a fuss? Chances are, she’ll just say she was being friendly. Although seeing your girl flirt with other men is wounding, scientists say that women flirt to get what they want in life and you could benefit from their fluttering eyes as well.  

Researchers from the University of California and the London School of Economics conducted studies into female charm and found that flirting makes men feel good so that women can get what they want. The study suggests women who flirt get around 20 per cent off of the original price of the car they were buying.

White wedding

When you were dating, you both shared the same common fear of big, overindulgent, frivolous white weddings. Yet, since you’ve popped the question your girl seems to have changed. All she can think about is walking down that aisle and rather than the quirky, mellow wedding you both discussed in your dating days, you’re getting a princess-themed ceremony at a big, expensive country club.

Even if your girl thinks she doesn’t want a big, white wedding, secretly, under all of her indie, cool charm, she does. It’s as if the white dress and bank-breaking décor is hardwired into every girl’s brains and it’s practically going against nature to ask for a low-key do.

Sex 

Do you constantly feel like you have to beg for sex? Do you find yourself doing chores just to get her into bed? You are not alone my friend. Researchers found that men who did chores around the house got 50 per cent more sex than those who didn’t. Could it be that because women have less desire to have sex than us guys that they are using sex as a reward for chores?

Maybe, but gentlemen, a study undertaken by Kinsey Institution found that women felt being sexually satisfied was a priority when it came to being happy in a long-term relationship. So, putting these two studies together means that women do care about sex and that maybe they’re just telling us they don’t need it so that we do the dishes; just putting it out there.

Orgasm

It’s been drummed into girls that telling you she doesn’t orgasm when you have sex with her will shatter you. Yet 16 per cent of women are thought to never achieve orgasms, whilst 26 per cent of women reported faking an orgasm during sex in a study of 50,000 women from the US, Australia and the UK.

Yet, in the midst of wild, hot sex how can you tell that she’s faking it? Well, like us, when women come they are pretty uninhibited and just go with it. If you look at your girl and she seems pretty controlled then she might be faking. If you think she might be faking, ask her what she’d like you to do to her in bed and ask her for a little guidance. Read more on realbuzz.com...

There is never enough time

There is never enough time. When I was still working, I’d always tell myself that when I retire I will do this, I will do that, I will have the time. During my youth, I was very athletic. Believe it or not but a week would comprise of M-W-F Aerobics, and T-TH-S weight lifting. During Sundays, it would be an hour of lap at our club house Olympic size pool. Yes, that was the life for me. When I started working my time was constraint, so I had to settle for Tennis twice a week after office, and still swimming every Sunday. Then I got married. Luckily my husband was also a sports enthusiast, but since our working schedule is hectic, we would jog for 30 minutes every morning before heading for the office, and still swimming for an hour every Sunday. 10 years, I finally got pregnant. Don’t get me wrong, we wanted to have children, we were just not lucky. This changed everything. I had a very sensitive pregnancy. My condition was what OBs called Multiple Mayoma. My baby was growing accompanied by 3 mass inside my womb. This of angered the baby thus giving me 24/7 contractions. 8 difficult months passed and thru a C section our daughter was born.

So now, from a wife I have turned into a mother as well. It was a handful! Sad to say there was no longer time for any form of exercise. From 110 pounds I grew into a whopping 165 pounds! Imagine my grief as I see myself growing and growing tremendously and to think I was even on an endless diet. From office work, to cooking, doing the grocery, taking care of the baby, I just don’t have the time.

My daughter is now 6, she’s about to start school. I have been in retirement for almost a year but still no exercise. Why? How can others do it? Why can’t I? I wanted to learn YOGA. Besides its holistic help, it will also be great for losing weight but I just don’t have time.

Here’s the deal, I can let somebody else take care of my little girl. Let somebody else bathe her, cook for her, feed her, teach her homework, take her to school. I can have somebody else fetch her from school, bring her home and prepare her dinner. I can have somebody else tuck her in and kiss her good night. Yes, that will give me the time.

I will have the whole day to myself, do my YOGA and maybe hit the SPA after. Grab some brunch with my girlfriends and coffee afterwards. We could chit chat on how our sessions went, have some juicy gossip time and maybe a little trip to the mall on the side. Afterwards I will come home, have a warm bath and go to sleep miserable.

Others may find it corny, or even pitiful to live a life like I do, but I love it. I love being a mother. I love doing the things I do. I wouldn’t trade a day I spend with my daughter for anything. I want to be there for her, to watch her as she grow. I want to be her best friend, her confidant. I know that the time may come when she will have her own friends, and they will want to do their own thing, but until that moment comes, I guess - I don’t have the time and loving it.

Motherless, an advantage ?

I’ve just come upon a realization that most children’s book lead star are motherless. Cinderella, Snow White, Ariel the little mermaid & Belle of Beauty and the Beast were all motherless. Dumbo, Bambi & Little Foot of the land before time were also motherless. Be it a human or animal in nature, it seems that story tellers have discovered this “Motherless” approach to give their characters hero status.

NOT FOR KIDS Fairy Tale

All of us are familiar with the famous Disney Princess. We love their stories of happily ever after. But are you aware that these were not the original versions. Disney just didn’t have the heart of how the original versions concluded, so he came up with his own happy endings. 

 

In the the original French version (by Charles Perrault)  of Little Red Riding Hood, the tale was not quite so nice, here she was eaten by the wolf, there was no woodsman, no grandmother.

In the very 1st version of the Little Mermaid by Hans Christian Andersen, the mermaid sees the Prince marry a princess and she despairs. She is offered a knife with which to stab the prince to death to become a mermaid again, but rather than do that she jumps into the sea and dies by turning to froth.

 

In the original tale of Snow white & the 7 dwarves, the Queen actually asks for Snow White’s liver and lungs to be served for dinner. Also in the original, Snow White wakes up when she is jostled by the prince’s horse as he carries her back to his castle – not from a magical kiss. In the Grimm version, the tale ends with the Queen being forced to dance to death in red hot iron shoes.

In the original Sleeping Beauty, she was put to sleep by curse. The king seeing her asleep rapes her. After nine months she gives birth to two children (while still asleep). One of the children sucks her finger removing the piece of flax which was keeping her asleep. She wakes up to find herself raped and the mother of two kids.

In the original tale dating 1837, the the bears find Goldilocks and rip her apart and eat her.

In the sinister variation by the Grimm brothers, Cinderella’s nasty step-sisters cut off parts of their own feet in order to fit them into the glass slipper hoping to fool the prince. The prince is alerted to the trickery by two pigeons who peck out the step sister’s eyes. They end up spending the rest of their lives as blind beggars while Cinderella gets to lounge about in luxury at the prince’s castle.

I think I would rather have my daughter know the Disney Versions LOL

i miss that feeling ...

I miss that feeling

That everything is alright

I miss that feeling

Sleeping like a baby at night

I miss that feeling

That peace of mind

Knowing that somebody

Will always be by my side

Where has chivalry gone? Lost are the days of knights in shining armor always ready to rescue their damsels in distress. They say times have changed. A woman now has to be strong, to be able to stand on her own, not dependent on anybody else. We can do what men do ! We can lead companies, rule countries ! Hooray ! For we are now not the weaker sex, we are now an equal !

But is it really so bad ? To have somebody hold your hand, lend you his jacket in the rain, let you cry over some silly sad movie, and laugh with you with the funny ones. To have somebody ask you “ are you ok?” and give you his shoulder when your not. Wouldn’t it be a relief when you just don’t have to be strong enough ?

I remember from a distant past what it feels like, to be cared for by somebody… I miss that feeling.

I have been paddling my own canoe for a long time, I’ve forgotten what it feels like to take a cruise.

i thought i was cinderella

I met prince charming when I was 11. He was perfect. Good looking, intelligent, athletic & fabulously wealthy. He was everything a girl could ever wish for. On dreamy mornings when the weather is just right, and the sun is nowhere in sight, all I could think of was the two of us kissing in the rain.

Everybody liked him, they wanted to be around him. You can just imagine all the cheerleaders trying to bag him. I was a nobody, a transferee from another school. I made a couple of friends, all of which are none existent like me to the nobility population. They say there are only 2 kinds of girls, the cheerleaders and the nerds. Imagine my agony not belonging to any of the two. Yep, I am with the rest of “everbody else” category.  Folks with standard lives, allowable looks, run of the mill intelligence & middle class earning. We were the corners basking in their bright light as they pass the corridor of this fearful world called high school.

Don’t worry, there’s a happy segment to this tale of mine - I was Cinderella. I never deemed it possible but he noticed me, and soon enough we were a couple. Envision the load of angry eyes on me every day, every month, every year. It was the best 8 years of my life. Suddenly high school wasn’t so bad, and college was even better. He was true to his title Prince Charming. He truly swept me off my feet, he turned me into a princess, his princess.

I thought it will last forever …  but it didn’t. Every fairy tale has an evil step mother. Mine came as his mother. The queen disapproves of this peasant girl being the wife of the future king. So she made him choose, and he chose the throne. THE END.

Not all Fairy Tales have a happy ending.